A new teacher arrives at St. Trinians college, to replace one who was murdered. As the killings continue, she starts to investigate…
Released by the Troma company in 1984 (though apparently shot in 1981 and 1982), Splatter University has all the cliches you expect in a slasher film; a college location, a group of teens being picked off, bloody deaths and a twist at the end. It’s problem is that it doesn’t use them very well.
The film was written by Michael Cunningham, Richard W. Haines, John Elias Michalakis, with contributions from Miljan Peter Ilich. Despite having four writers, it’s not a well written film at all. Some of the dialogue is among the worst I’ve come across in any slasher film. It tries to keep the killer’s identity secret, but it’s glaringly obvious who it is. Part of that is also down to the direction of Richard W. Haines. When you focus a lot of shots on certain parts of the body, it’s clear what the film is suggesting.
The cast are not great either, with the exception Forbes Riley (known as Francine Forbes in the cast here) plays the lead and does her best with the material. She’s easily the best thing about this film. The rest of the acting, to be charitable, is poor.
Musically the film is generic, there’s no real suspense, the killings are poorly staged though very bloody indeed. There is really not much here the film has going for it.
And yet, it nearly gets away with it in its final moments, by pulling of a genuine surprise and if the film had ended about two minutes before it did, it would have worked so much better. It wouldn’t have saved the film, but would have made it more interesting.
Splatter University is not the worst slasher film I have ever seen. But that’s not much of a recommendation.
I was surprised to find this film getting a Blu-Ray release from 88 Films, especially when other, better films don’t or haven’t had one. As a curio of slasher genre, or if a slasher film completist, it might be worth checking out, but it’s not a film you’ll watch more than once.
Rating: * out of 5
The Grump Of Horror 